The Dummies That Run the Jail

Okay, boys and girls, I am going to try to tell you how I came to spend some time last Sunday thru Monday at the Columbiana Jail. I am not a criminal nor have I been arrested before. I should not have been arrested last Sunday but the young girl that stopped me seemed very intent on it. Let me go back a few days and tell you that I spent eight hours in the ER in a whole lot of pain with my right shoulder. They gave me a shot and 3 prescriptions. One of them was for an anti-inflamatory, hydroco/apap, generic for loratab 7.5, The other 2 were to calm my stomach if that made me feel pukey.

I took one Friday and again Saturday--and went to sleep afterwards. The directions said to take 1 to 2 pills every 4 hrs, but I always start out by taking the smaller dosage. I woke up early Sunday morning and needed to go to the only store open, WM. I planned to go there and come right home. It's about a 5 min drive. I couldn't tell much difference in my arm--it still HURT! After I got back to the car, I spent several minutes trying to put the car in gear so I could leave. During this time, I was screaming from the pain. I finally gritted my teeth and used both hands and got it in D! I was saying a few choice words! I knew when I got home I was going to be taking another dose of pain medication. Out where we are it's very dark. I was looking for our road when I realized there were a couple of cars behind me and it was making it hard to see. I was mostly holding onto the steering with my left hand because the right one hurt so much. I looked in the rear view mirror and I knew I crossed over the line but I corrected it. Next came the flashing lights and I pulled over in a church driveway. This young woman had me get out of the car and said she wanted me to touch my nose, put one foot in front of the other and follow her pen with just my eyes, which I did. (I was hoping she would say try to strangle me!)I said why are you asking me this--I am a diabetic and I don't drink. She said I had gone over the white line and I could've killed someone. I was a minute from where I lived and the only other people were behind me on the road!

I was standing by my car and she came up and grabbed my hand and said she was going to arrest me for PUBLIC INTOXICATION! How the hell can that be if I haven't had anything to drink? She put me in handcuffs in her backseat! They said they would go tell my son what happened and give him the food I'd just bought. They only half did that and my car was not towed to where they said it would be. We were driving to the other side of the county and I asked where we were going. Columbiana County Jail--I think that is what the little hellhole is called! The sun was just coming up when we got in that area. She drove inside and I asked to have the handcuffs removed because they were pinching my wrists. She finally got around to removing them and I was given a stiff blanket and put in a glass cell. I was told I'd be there 12 hrs! No one in my family knew where I was. The AC was set very low and it was very cold in there.

I'm going to save part 2 for the real hell.